Lists

I'm a "lists" kinda person. It makes me feel more organized and less stressed. I make lists for EVERYTHING. For example, like which rooms need what cleaning, things I need to remind people of, talks I need to have with others, grocery lists, "next morning to do". It goes on. But, I've never really put thought into a "what I want to do" list. I mean, I have the list of what to do before I kick the bucket. [ Bucket list] So, I thought.. I'd leave this tab up for a few days and add some things to it, as I thought about it. Most ideas were thought of while sitting outside, smoking and watching planes. I made two separate lists. The first list, Things I'd like to do or accomplish before I'm 25, that are reasonable at least. The second list, Things I want to do within the next 2-3 years. If you think you would like to do with me to help cross of the ideas that'd be awesome. :)


1st List: Things I'd love to accomplish before I'm 25.

        - Visit Paris. I've always wanted to stand underneath the Eiffel Tower. I know alot of people say they want to go, but I have this thriving want and ambition to get there one day.
        - Go to New York City. I don't give a damn if it is for a day. Or an afternoon. I have so many friends that tell me the traffic is horrible, people are rude, pocket pickers. I dont care. I'll park in a parking lot. And walk. People can be rude, I'll just smile. I'll keep my money in my shoe. I want to see what Jason saw. All of it. He talked to me about it once. I don't remember the entire conversation, He just seemed so pleased with it. Happy. I want to listen to the noise, and see all the lights.
         - Go to Disney world/land. Either is fine. I use to envy all of my friends that would saw pictures or tell me about their trips there. Maybe I'll take my kids.
         - Take a Culinary and Zoology class. I love cooking, baking, decorating. Everything. It's amazing. I have literally nonstop fun when I'm baking or decorating. It's a way of showing my creativity. Zoology, has always interested me. I wouldn't want to become a zoologist, I'd just like to take a class or two.
           - Own the 2011 Hyundai Genesis Coupe. I love them. Its my dream car. And its not a ridiculous amount of money. I think 30 grand brand new. Its got the evo motor in it.
        

List two! Things I'd love to do within the next 2-3 years!


             - Ballroom Dancing. I would absolutely love to be able to Ballroom dance. It's beautiful. To move your body as one. I love it. I'd pay just to take ONE class! Brandon would never take that class with me, but I'm sure I'd still have tons of fun alone.
              - Go to Storm Brothers Ice Cream Inc. I haven't been there in 5 years. Its a little pricey. But absolutely amazing. Theres probably over 45 different flavors.
              - Pottery Class. I tried to get my mom to sign us up for local classes. They wanted 125 dollars per person over 6 weeks, with 1 class a week! A little pricey for us.
              - Go to Ocean City with Brandon again. We went the first 2 weeks we were dating. It was amazing. We only stayed for an afternoon. But I loved it. I want to do it again.







Well, Thats all for Now. I'm sure I forgot a few good things. But I'll remember them eventually. 

Life is a fairytale..

I got up at 830 this morning, and spent an hour with my dad and Brandon to go look at a car that I might buy. [ it was ugly!] Then, sat in the truck for 50 minutes while they ran around the junkyard. I hate that you have to be at least 18 to go in.. only 7 more months! We ended up going to 3 different auctions in Washington DC... Found nothing. I'm a Eclipse/talon kinda person. I just love them. So, when my dad was showing interest in a blue neon.. Oh.. i was so not pleased.. I think, im going to let him buy me that stupid neon, drive it, save my money and buy a dsm and work on it.


New subject..

My mom has run off to New York this weekend. Not only is she not with either of her boytoys. I'm pretty sure shes their with some new guy. I tried calling her 4 times tonight. Phones been off for 3 hours.. at least. Voicemail is full. What if something happened to one of her kids and no one could get ahold of her? How would she know?

Annnnddd another new subject..

Oh, the lying. I caught brandon in a lie tonight.. I'm not mad, because I guess in a way I'm being selfish. But, I don't know about anyone else out there but theres always that one friend of your boyfriends' who you just can't stand. Well for me and Brandon.. Its his inadequate, obnoxious friend Tristan. I mean this kid does not cause anything but problems for me and Brandon. When we first started dating Brandon had warned me of Tristans infamous car accidents. such as flipping a car, rolling it down a ditch. and such other things. So, when he decided to go 95 on route 50 with me in the car and wouldnt slow down when asked. I called brandon the second I got home. Anyways, back on topic. Me and my family are huge into mitsubishi Eclipses and eagle talons. My dads owned over 200 of them. So, when Brandon got into them it pushed me a little back from getting one. I like them because you rarely see them in Annapolis. I always asked Brandon to stop pushing his friends towards buying them. Simply because I like them because I rarely see them..And tonight, Brandon got a ride from his buddy to wawa and back. And after 30 minutes of not returning inside I went out to see what was holding them up. Brandon and him were talking in his car. No big deal. Then, [ B doesnt yet know this] I find out that Brandons been telling ANOTHER buddy of his about how Him and tristan talked tonight and tristans selling his car tomorrow and buying an eclipse brandon found for him. The buddy he was sharing this info with, asked if I knew and was mad. Brandon's reply? " yep" . I did not know. And I know im overreacting but it hurts my feelings when he hides things.

Long story short. Car hunting is harder than I thought, My mom is inconsiderate, and due to the unacceptable lying and hiding of things from my boyfriend. I no longer feel the need to have a DSM.


On a happier note. My anxiety picking hasn't been an issue for exactly 6 days! I don't know if its because I got my eyebrows waxed after so long and I don't feel self conscious about them anymore or its because Im not as stressed anymore. :)

Its almost Prom time !

Which completely fucking blows. I know its my own fault for not being able to go. But, Imagine having it right there, right in front of you. Getting excited about it 5 months in advance. Buying the perfect dress, which you feel absolutely gorgeous in.. 4 months before..  1 month to go, and your literally, literally... counting down the days to go. Thinking about how your gonna do your hair, nails, makeup, maybe add a ribbon to your dress? what shoes will look best. Your not worrying about the little things anymore.. Like that fact that your date is shorter.. or what your gonna do when you get there while waiting for all your friends. And 2 weeks before prom.. someone comes up and rips it right out from under you? Just takes it all away in under 10 seconds. Or the blink of an eye. Which is about the amount of time it took me to read the text.. He met some girl, knew her for 3 days. [ yeah.. THREE days!] and she decides she doesn't like the fact that hes going with some other girl. Even just as friends.  they're not dating. Not even really friends. She takes her top off for him and BAM! He thinks shes the one for him. So, he DESTROYS my feelings, our friendship. For her to tell him on the day of prom. She has a boyfriend. She never really liked him that way. So, he goes to prom alone. I sit at home and watch the limos driving by. And I'll be doing the same thing this year, with that dress in the closet. tags still on it. Collecting dust.. 

Prom's overrated. right?    

Morning Birds

Yesterday morning me and my sister Jaime sat on the front porch and we were questioning why there were so many black birds in all the surrounding neighbors yard, but when they all flew away at once, they had orange underneath of them! They were the state bird "orioles" ! They're so pretty! And we have this woodpecker that sits in the trees and just taps away. Some mornings we can see him, but yesterday he was pretty high up. We had my niece and nephew [Blake and Ashleigh] here for the weekend too. Blake's almost 9 so he always just plays video games. But, Ashleigh keeps me on my toes and constantly making sure shes not in the front yard. Figures, that I say she can play out front since me and Brandon were out there and as soon as she runs out there, a brown pitbull comes running out of someones yard! I rarely ever see that neighbors dog, so when I do I get so nervous. He NEVER puts it on a leash.

Well, I brought up Jason's headstone to my dad. That did not go as planned.. He got really defensive. Like, who was I to ask him about paying for my brothers headstone. It's going on 4 years now since Jason died. I think it's time to order one. I never really understood why he bought a 30,000 dollar car before a 5 or 6 thousand dollar stone. I hate going there and seeing that all he has with his name on it is a tiny plastic green box.

Oh mother.. Everytime I talk to her it's like I am a burden to her. Maybe because I catch her in almost every lie she tells me. She has a new "boytoy". Ugh, hes so nasty. She's breaking up with her current boyfriend to date this crappy one. [ yup, shes dating two at once] She took me to dinner to meet him and his son. He was rude. And made a horrible first impression. He reached across the table, and started picking things off her plate and eating them! I find that rude and disgusting. And he asked the waitress to move our table from the eating room to right next to the noisy bar! And didn't order an alcoholic beverage! Maybe to watch the basketball game that was on the 4 tv's surrounding us? I caught him in a few lies also. And the worst part! 2 weeks after meeting me, someone vandalized his car. And the first person he tried to blame? ME! [ In all honesty I wouldn't even waste my time] And she made me aware recently that I will be needing to remove all my stuff out of her other boyfriends house. Resulting in her trying to take as much furniture of mine to her new boyfriends house because " he doesnt have alot of furniture to begin with".


I saw this on another blog. Its from a book. I can't remember all of the details. But I kinda thought of it as a to-do list.

try: A new recipe
see: friends I haven't seen in forever
taste: something amazingly delicious that I cook for the first time.
listen: to the birds in the morning more often
visit: the zoo and take my niece Sarah
start: Working out
stop: putting off working for my dad
organize: the somewhat room me and Brandon have
read: all the books I have piled up from last summer
play: the wii game just Dance 2.
learn: yoga

This is my nephew Blake, And my niece Ashleigh. So freaking cute <3

First post!

I didn't want to write the longest "profile" about me. So, I'll do it here. I have the most wonderful boyfriend, Brandon of two years.  I live at my dads house. It's me, my sister Jaime. My little brother Jarrod, My dad and my boyfriend Brandon. All my siblings names start with "J", except two of my moms kids. So, we have the ever lasting names of : Jason, Stephen, Justin, John, Amber, Jessica, Jaime, Me, Jarrod! And if you want to count my adoptive brother.. Peter! Jason died about 4 years ago. Stephen now lives in Florida, has a new little girl Annelise and is in and out of prison. I'm the closest with Justin in my opinion and He has two kids. John.. is a really long story. Amber and me never really get along, simply because I watch her kids more than she does. Jessi lives in Virginia Beach now with her 2 little girls Bella and Sammi. And the rest live with me and my dad! I hate living here, and I honestly think that Brandon is the one that is keeping me sane! I lived with my older brother Justin and his girlfriend Nicole, and their kids Blake and Ashleigh up until about last July. It wasn't so bad until I lost my job at the local pet store. So, we moved in with my dad. What comes along with having an extra large family? Extra amount of Drama.